Generally, when it comes to parties, people often take the “more the merrier” approach, because it often fits the occasion. By the same token, one should probably have two bridal showers, bachelorette parties, or engagement parties, but a lot of women simply refrain. You could be getting offers from more than one group to attend a pre-wedding event held in your honor, but the “cool” factor is simply too elusive in many cases. Like a lot of sages have probably said, your situation at the time is supposed to dictate which way you turn. The following is a list of instances where you should and should not hold more than one bridal shower.
Your Parents and in-laws Insist on Separate Events
Suppose the imminent bride’s and groom’s parents and families are not all that close yet, or they live in totally far-off cities. In such a case, it is okay to hold more than one bridal shower, although you will need to keep the guest lists separate so as not to come off as fishing for gifts (there will be wedding party gifts too, remember?).
If, on the other hand, your folks and those of your intended live in the same town and are somewhat familiar with one another, two parties can seem a bit excessive. The best way forward then is getting both or all groups to work together towards setting up a single event. Just that process alone should form some new bonds among them, which is a welcome bonus.
Your Parents are Separated or Divorced
If either of you has divorced or separated parents, the whole prospect of wedding planning can get a bit complicated right from the get-go. If, for instance, your step-mom and mom want to throw separate events in your honor, then you will have to reconcile yourself with two engagement parties at the very least. Just be sure that every person invited to each of these things is invited to your wedding as well, and that your budget is able to carry the latter.
Your Family Lives in Another City
Many couples stay in separate cities from their parents for a variety of reasons, in which cases they would also have a number of local friends wanting to throw them some event or the other after they announce their engagement. Something like this cannot be discounted just because your parents want to throw you one as well, and vice versa. If all the people you love and know back home are getting ready to hold a separate engagement party for you, then it is probably best going with that too. Again, be sure to keep the guest lists as exclusive as you can, so you do not hinder people’s schedules in any way.
There are Different Generations of People Wanting to Host Radically Different Parties
Your parents may want a nice and quiet dinner party where you smile and warm up to close relatives, while your siblings and cousins much younger in age plan an all-night rager to mark your imminent nuptial and “loss of freedom”. Keeping these two separate is often the only way, and it is fine if you have to. Make sure that both sets of hosts are aware of “the other party” so that they do not get in each other’s way.
Your Colleagues and Bridesmaids Have Planned Separate Showers
It is probably your bridesmaids are not acquainted with your coworkers. If the two teams fail to anticipate each other’s showers, or simply prefer to keep things separate, then that is cool too. Office showers are usually surprise affairs, which means you would normally not get a chance to do anything but enjoy yours, so just go with it.
Some Friends Cannot Make it to your Shower Destination
If your bridal shower is at an exotic destination, then in all likelihood there will be those that are invited but cannot attend. They may wish to throw you a separate shindig altogether after you get back to your place of residence. It is best in such cases to stick to low-key celebrations, with relaxed dinners, a picnic or hike, and a spa day for all those who could not make it to your original weekend getaway. That way, no one feels left out.
Your Wedding Party is Large and Do Not Know Each Other
First off, the maid of honor or the best man is supposed to unite all your main people—the bridesmaids and groomsmen. Just because they are largely unacquainted does not mean that you should hold separate showers. Get your head bridesmaid and groomsman to make sure everybody is making plans for the same party. Meanwhile, you should take some notes and use them while planning
your after wedding party.
The above situations are some which you would encounter fairly easily and without looking, where your pre-wedding parties are concerned. Just be sure that you and your fiancé are okay with how things proceed, and that you do not take on the kind of stress that makes a lot of people put off their weddings till a later date.